Bikini Chain Gang

This Skinamax spoof of women in prison flicks really gives up the sex, nudity and, surprisingly enough, bondage.

Cuffs, nudity and lesbianism in the opening credits. Welcome to Skinamax, baby!

Copyright 2008 by Pat Powers

Bikini Chain Gang opens with a pair of inmates dressed in brief prison togs (for about ten seconds) having lesbian sex in a locker room. They get naked and lesbian sex it up big time, though not explicitly, as befits a Skinamax film. Later, they're naked and cuddling and enjoying the afterglow, and they're discovered by a big, bossy prison guard. Matron Togar (played by Nicolette Sheridan, who does a great job of hamming it up in a role that calls for major hamming).

When thespians go lesbian ...

Instead of chewing them out, she chases off one of them, then tells the other it's time to chew HER out, if you know what I mean. (And if you don't, what I mean is that the con gives the guard oral sex. Very willingly and happily, I might add.)

Guard-inmate relations at Generic State Prison for Women are quite friendly.

And that's why Bikini Chain Gang doesn't "feel" anything like a real women in prison flick -- all the sex has a very consensual feel to it, even the stuff that is supposedly coerced. Everybody -- inmates, guards, warden, innocent by-standers, is clearly having a great time. You never get the idea that ANYBODY in this film is going to turn a chance for sex down. Everyone in this prison has so much fun you get the impression that most lesbians would break INTO it just to join in the fun.

And it's OK that Bikini Chain Gang doesn't feel like a women in prison flick, because it works very well as the genial, sexy spoof that it is.

Meanwhile, back at the plot, the Undead Bandit (he wears a skeletal-looking Mexican wrestling mask while committing his crimes) is terrorizing the city, robbing everything with complete impunity.

Jessie is taken hostage by the Undead Bandit. Check out the guy at the bar to the right of the vidcap. I say that when you're so into drinking that an armed robbery with pretty female hostage occurring directly behind you isn't enough to distract you, yuou probably need to think about cutting back a little. A lot, actually.

Cute little Jessie (played by Beverly Lynne) is working at a waitress in a bar and is having a tough time with a rude customer. Suddenly, the Undead Bandit appears, robbing it. He takes Jessie hostage at one point, and when a cop shows up, the rude customer claims that Jessie was working in cahoots with the Undead Bandit.

Next thing you know, Jessie is sitting in a prison van headed for Generic State Prison for Women, shackled at the ankles and cuffed at the wrists and looking unhappy.

A cuffed and worried (and playing up the cuffs) Jessie rides the prison van. Her feet are also shackled. If Skinamax can get this stuff right, why don't mainstream women in prison flicks? Because they're stupid or because they don't "get" bondage imagery, or because they actively resist it.?Given how generally appropriate bondage imagery is in women in prison flicks, and how dramatically powerful it is, I think they're resisting bondage imagery, though probably not consciously.

Jessie's taken to see the warden, her hands still cuffed. She proclaimed that she was railroaded, framed. Warden Kendrick (ably played by Skinamax stalwart Jay Richardson) tells Jessie that all of his inmates were framed, but promises to help her rehabilitate herself in his role as a goofy, do-gooder warden.

Jessie and Tommy ecstatically kiss as they reunite. Note that Lynne is playing the cuffs for all they're worth. What a trooper.

To show he means business, Warden Kendrick reunites Jessie with her boyfriend Tommy (Evan Stone, who DO get around -- he does softcore, hardcore, and he's made appearances on doing the sexual bondage thing). They're so happy and joyful at being reunited that Warden Kendrick gets all verklempt and leaves his office so Tommy and Jessie can have a conjugal visit inside it. (It's Skinamax, what can I say?)

Jessie and Tommy put the "unite" in "reunite" to work in a literal sense. Note that Lynne works the cuffs hard, and the camera angle takes maximum advantage of the cuffs. Once again, Skinamax gets it right in relation to mainstream wip flicks.

But although Warden Kendrick was kind enough to give the two young lovers the use of his office for their pre-incarceration orgy, he somehow doesn't think to remove Jessie's cuffs, so she spends the entire sexual "visit" with her hands cuffed in front of her.

A nice image of helplessness as Tommy hooks Jessie's cuffs behind his neck so they can do a little carry-around lovin'.

What we're left with is Beverly Lynne mostly naked (her crop top prison tank top is hiked up over her breasts, since she can't get them past her cuffs) and in handcuffs, getting her brains fucked out by Evan Stone in a nice, long scene where the cuffs are visually played up throughout. And Lynne really works the cuffs throughout the scene and the camera is right there on top of it.

Oral sex has Jessie clutching the edge of the warden's desk with her cuffed hands, and the camera is right on top of it.

This scene nicely illustrates the difference between women in prison flick porn and actual women in prison flicks -- the porn absolutely glories in playing up the sexual bondage, whereas sexploitation flicks often don't have bondage at all, much less sexual bondage. Lifetime flicks also lack sexual bondage imagery, though when they have bondage scenes they play them up pretty good for their pathos factor, so you have to figure they'd do the same with an actual sexual bondage scene).

This Skinamax scene actually includes closeups of the handcuffs. Contrast with mainstream wip flicks. Then write me a thousand word paper on the topic ... oh, wait ... I've already done that.

After the tryst, Jessie gets taken to meet her new cellmate, Taffy (played by Belinda Gavin). Taffy is full of scary tales of prison life. 'Just last Thursday Togar had me bent over my cot and did me doggie style with her nightstick!" declares Taffy. "Then, the next day when I said "hi!" to her she looked at me like she didn't even know me!"

Here's Evan Stone making an appearance on our advertiser's site, Sex and Submission. Note the much more extensive bondage, the use of a gag, the much more submissive bondage position of the DiD -- the Internet still rules when it comes to porn, especially bondage porn. Censors like to portray Internet porn sites as some freaky, beyond the pale area, but really, this is just a variation on the Skinamax scenes we've seen above. A very GOOD variation, but still ...

(The humor is Bikini Chain Gang is actually pretty good, well above the usual Skinamax fare. For example, when the Undead Bandit is robbing the bar, he makes the bartender empty the till, then returns some of the cash to him as a tip. Or when Tommy first sees Jessie in Warden Kendrick's office, her promises her, "I'll do everything I can to get you a new trial, this time one with lawyers and witnesses and everything!" It really gives you a warm feeling: these actors are willing to get naked on camera, have sex on camera, including sexual bondage, and ALSO do comedy. That's being a trooper!)

The bikini chain gang, hard at work. They appear to be in a state park, breaking up the rocks on somebody's fire ring. You can tell they know just what they're doing. I think anyone in their vicinity, including them, should get hazardous duty pay for that scene.

The do-gooder warden puts Jessie on the prison's bikini chain gang, in hopes that the fresh air and exercise will do her good. Being on the bikini chain gang is an honor and privilege that prisoners generally have to put out sexually to Matron Togar to obtain, so she's pissed about that. But she soon has some recompense: the Undead Bandit bribes her to kill Jessie, because he's worried that if she gets a trial with lawyers and everything (Jessie just MIGHT have been railroaded) it will cause problems for him.

Matron Togar, in cahoots with the Undead Bandit. Who'd a thunk it? And how do you get into a prison wearing a wrestling mask.

On the bikini chain gang run the next day, Madam Togar is toting a shotgun and has its sights set squarely on Jessie's back. At the worksite the inmates are force to take off their prison garb on the roadside and don "recycled bikinis provided by the Toys for Tarts program."

Then they're shackled at the ankles and give their assignment by Matron Togar. 'You are going to break large rocks into smaller rocks, using large, heavy tools, for no apparent reason."

Then she orders the male guard into the back of the van with her.

"But the prisoners will run away!" he exclaims.

"No!" she reassureshim in a very loud voice. "The prisoners have nowhere to go. There's nothing around here except that farm about three miles down the road with a pickup truck full of gas sitting in the driveway."

"Well, that's OK, then," the male guard says, and he and Togar go into the back of the van and have sex.

"What was THAT all about?" asks Jessie.

"Oh, she always has sex while we're out here," explains another inmate. "Generally, though, she makes us watch."

Madame Togar gets a little doggie-style lovin' in the back of the prison van.

"I've learned a lot from her," confesses another inmate.

Do Cindy and her fellow chain-gangers make a break for it? Will Togar take the opportunity to shoot Jessie? Or will Jessie get a new trial, this one with lawyers and everything? I'm not going to tell, because in a Skinamax film, none of these questions matter.

They don't matter because Bikini Chain Gang is not a women in prison flick, it's a bawdy comedy, happily spoofing the real thing while paying the bulk of its attention to providing plenty of nudity and sex, their real raison de'tre.

I can't tell if Beverly Lynne is having a real onscreen orgasm or trying not to lose her balance. That's the glory of Skinamax sex scenes. You never know..

So, if you are foolish enough to watch Bikini Chain Gang looking for a real women in prison flick, you'll probably be disappointed. If you're looking for a bawdy, mildly funny spoof that provides a lighthearted break from the real thing, you're in for a treat.

Members of the Bikini Chain Gang make a break for it, still shackled at the ankles. I guess you know this means ... it's the end!

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